California

You assholes...just let the gays get married...goddammit...









Look at that...its 2 chicks making out...how can you hate on that?

Pull your head out of your ass California.

January, February and March

The gentlemen of PYHOOYA all live, work and play north of the Mason-Dixon. This is because the South sucks, but that’s a post for another day. (I refuse to acknowledge this.) But the problem with living in the Second City is that we have Winter.

It’s not that Winter is inherently bad, sometimes it’s almost refreshing for the temperature to drop. Until about…fucking January, when it’s time for Winter to go back from whence it came. I could live in an eternal cycle of April-December. Think about it, you shake off the hangover from New Year’s and greet a beautiful Spring day knowing that the weather will continue to get warmer. About September or so, when you are getting sick of sweating like the Fail Bus Driver, it starts to cool off. It gets all Fall-ish in time for you to be outdoorsy in the sense of drinking and tailgating outside. Then it gets cold and snowy just in time for Christmas and New Year’s. Perfect.

Now I know we just endorsed Obama, but after that straight up beat down that he just threw on McCain, it’s no longer “cool,” “hip” and “progressive” to support Obama. I’m done with him. I’m running for president against him in 2012.

My platform? Building a dome around the United States. The people will control the weather. We can put it to a vote in every major metropolitan area (except Denver and Hawaii which stay snowy and tropical respectively). Chicago also doesn’t get a vote. I’m keeping it on the ol’ April-December schedule. Will the dome fuck up Canada's weather? Who the fuck cares, EH?

What’s that you say? Speech?

Hello, fellow American. This you should vote me. I leave power good. Thank you. Thank you. If you vote me, I'm hot. Weather, it’ll be better. Sun. The democratic vote for me is right thing to do, America, so do.



Pull your head out of your ass January, February and March.

Identity Thiefs

Ok...I should really be studying right now...because I have tons of shit to do. But fuck that. Its 5:28 PM on election day, I'm tweaked out on caffeine, and I want to go get some beers so work is gonna have to wait. Also, in the interest of transparency this is a post for someone else (you know who you are), and while that's not usually how we do things here, I'm making an exception because I fucking want to...suck it. One more thing...I must apologize for my prolonged absence from the blogosphere (I feel dirty for having just used that word) but I've been super busy...school thinks I should pay attention to it instead of this bastion of hate. Sadly, while I'd like to ignore school, that wouldn't be a terribly good choice, so the blog loses...sorry. Anyway...on to the hate! (today it's in special street form)

Identity thiefs. You a bunch of bitches, ya'll some snitches. How you gon' steal another person's social security number. That ain't baller. I mean how you gon' try an' apply fo a bunch of credit cards an' shit wit' someone else shit? Is that hot? That's what's goin' down on the street?? Nah son, you ain't gon' play them like that. I'll straight stab a foo' fo that. If you ain't stop doin' that shit I'ma fuck yo ass up. I'm sayin' frosty, I'm talkin' spoon.

Alright that's enough of that...I can't be articulate when I talk like that. Seriously though. You're that much of a piece of shit that you have to steal someone else's identity, then use that information to ultimately steal money, or merchandise? That's some real amateur hour shit. That means you aren't a good enough thief to steal cool shit. You have to steal something small and relatively easy to get a hold of then use that to commit your crime while simultaneously fucking up someone else's life. Just man the fuck up and steal a plasma or a car if you're gonna be a dirtbag thief. Don't be a punk and do this Busch league shit.

















Pull your head out of your ass Identity Thiefs.

PYHOOYA Endorses: Barack Obama

Generally, we here at PYHOOYA like to stay above the fray and hate on everyone regardless of, well, pretty much everything. I've decided to breach decorum. In the true spirit of the United States' history of democratic elections, I've decided to very undemocratically endorse Barack Obama on behalf of all of us here at PYHOOYA. Some of the writers may disagree, but fuck them, this is my post.

Unlike, John McCain and his "Country First" slogan, Obama has never and would never subject the United States to the possibility of Sarah Palin as President. Obama has consistently opposed the war in Iraq, championed universal health care, pledged tax cuts to those who need it, vowed to wean America off of oil and onto green energy, and supported civil rights across the board.

FULL DISCLOSURE: I toured the Obama campaign's headquarters today. What struck me was the number of enthusiastic young people working in the office. Based on nothing, I can safely state with 100% certainty that McCain's got nothing on them. Obama has consistently fought for the little man, be it as a community organizer (unlike the pit bull with lipstick, I see this as a good thing), as an Illinois State Senator (he pushed legislation through to videotape all homicide interrogations by police officers so atrocities like John Burge's torture regime never happen again), as a Senator he increased the transparency of the federal government (admittedly with McCain as a co-sponsor), and as a presidential candidate he built his campaign around an army of small donors, refusing to take donations from lobbyists or PACs.

Obama is a former Harvard Law Review editor (and the first black editor at that) and a former constitutional law professor at the University of Chicago. He has the intelligence, the patience and the temperament to lead our nation through the upcoming steep uphill climb out of George Bush's gutter. The world supports Obama.

If Obama has one weakness (besides being too awesome) it is his foreign policy. To shore up this weakness, he made the responsible VP pick of Joe Biden, the current chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee.

In short, vote Obama. Don't stay home thinking this is in the bag. I'll be at the rally tomorrow, celebrating an America win.

YES WE CAN!

Gerrymandering

For those of you who don't know, gerrymandering is the practice of redrawing district lines for the purpose of favoring one party over another. It's named after Elbridge Gerry, the governor of Massachusetts from 1810-1812 who apparently is the first genius to try this. Witness the 4th Congressional District of Illinois, one of the most awesome things ever created. Look at that thing. It looks like something Trig Palin might draw (seriously, you suck Sarah Palin).



Why, you might ask, is it shaped like something an Alaskan infant with Down's syndrome would draw? It's designed to contain 2 primarily Hispanic neighborhoods in the Chicago area. See that little strip on the left there? Yeah, that's an interstate; literally nobody lives there. All the surrounding areas are in different districts. I can't say enough how much I love that this exists. It is just to hilarious for me to even properly describe. Seriously though, this is really a problem in our country and it needs to stop. I only laugh at it because 1) its funny as shit, 2) seriously...its really funny (I mean did you look at it?), and 3) if I don't laugh at it I might vomit with rage because of how terrible it is. Stop hurting America.


Pull your head out of your ass Gerrymandering.

Chad Javon Ocho Cinco

[Hating is not always healthy. To paraphrase Pat Bateman, it can dry your skin out and make you look old. Sometimes hating is just not appropriate either. We here at PYHOOYA are all about growing and evolving as a site. Therefore we are instituting a new feature that will appear randomly and keep you on your toes. You ready for this shit? This. Is. Continue Pissing Excellence.]

Unless you competely suck as a person (See: HUTA) then you follow the NFL and are well aware that, in a moment of pure brilliance, Chad Johnson legally changed his name to Chad Javon Ocho Cinco. This bears repeating, Chad Johnson legally changed his name to Chad Javon Ocho Cinco. This move makes everything I've ever done in my entire life (helping vaccinate children against malaria in the Amazon, climbing Mount Everest, brokering multilateral peace talks with North Korea) seem like a junior high spelling bee. The Bengals have now honored his new found legal identity and will list Johnson as Ocho Cinco for all club business. This includes, and my hat is off, the back of his jersey. Hell fucking yes.



So for our inaugural edition of Continue Pissing Excellence, I nominate Chad Javon Ocho Cinco as the only man, no, legend, worthy of this historic prize.

Continue pissing excellence Ocho Cinco.

Angelo Mozilo

This post may seem a bit obscure, but it is necessary for reasons to be made known shortly. Angelo Mozilo is the former CEO of Countrywide Financial, which accounts for roughly 20% of the mortgage lending in the country (READ: Subprime policy of lending money to families with less than $1000 in disposable). He was also the cofounder of IndyMac Federal Bank, which recently became the second largest bank failure in United States history.

Now it seems that I have set him up to knock him down on his general failures in life. You'd think so. However, take a look at him.



On the left there, this is what Angelo Mozilo looks like. It's like an Oompa Loompa and Frank Sinatra had a kid. Is that really his skin color? Is he the father of every sorority girl in the country? I don't really have much to say besides directing you to the above picture or to this Google Image gallery. Tread lightly, this level of tan has only been achieved by a certain rare breed of guidos located near Asbury Park on the Jersey Shore. You've been warned.

Pull your head out of your ass Mozilo.

Sarah Palin

[Disclaimer: We here at PYHOOYA do not take a political standing, while we do have our opinions this is a forum for hating, and we are equal opportunity haters. We will hate on anyone and anything that gives us the chance.]

Before I commence the dumping, let me first commend you for being the first female vice presidential candidate. (note: While I realize there have been other female vice presidential candidates, none of them had a realistic chance to win (sorry Geraldine Ferraro). So they don't count.) Imagine my glee when you so quickly provided me with a chance to show you the underside of the bus. Honestly, this was such a batting practice fastball that I almost feel bad using it...oh well, fuck yourself.

You have explicitly supported abstinence only sex education programs. Hey, good for you. Much respect for standing so firmly in support of an idea that is unequivocally without support from scientific or statistical data. I'm not sure if anyone told you what happens with abstinence only education but here's a pretty quick breakdown of how shit goes. Teenagers are horny as fuck. You're not gonna stop them from banging like rabbits. Seriously you're not. Surprisingly, telling them not to pork all the time will not actually stop them from doing it. So what do they do? Well...they fuck. I think we've established that. Instead of using some sort of contraception however, they just rawdog it. That leads to? Yep, you guessed it, pregnancies (not to mention increased incidence of STD's). Case in point. Your five months pregnant, 17 year-old daughter.



Pull your head out of your ass Palin.

Hey Posner, Give Me Your Cocktail... Fruit!!

Dear Richard Posner,

The other day I was eating lunch at Chicago's Standard Club. Guess what? You were there too, along with your four law clerks and their lacking senses of humor. Oddly enough, we both decided on dessert at about the same time, however, my young, agile body was able to make it to the buffet before your old, slowly decomposing body.

When you arrived at the dessert table, you undoubtedly knew exactly which of the delicious, hand-made sweets you wanted to eat. Unfortunately, all you could get to was my backside, because I was working that table. A little of this, a little of that.

I guess my indecision and the resulting delay in you getting to your dessert really pissed you off. You responded by catching my eye when I doubled back for more sweets, and giving me an intense mean mug. Let me tell you, Mr. Posner, I felt terrible. How dare I keep you from your sweet, sweet grapefruit.

Whoa. Whoa... a grapefruit? For desert? Oh word? You're a grapefruit eater? Bitch. You may have published 40 books, but you gonna need 'em when you sellin' fake hats in Times Square.

Sincerely,

HUTA

P.S. Pull your head out of your ass Posner.

New York... Stop Getting HIV!

A recent CNN.com article stated that an estimated 72 out of every 100,000 people in New York, or 4,800 people were infected with HIV (Human Immunodeficiency Virus) in 2006. That is more than three times the national average rate of infection. The article came in the wake of studies performed using a new technology that is able to pinpoint the time of infection to within a six month window.

Naturally, when I read the initial paragraphs of the article, I thought to myself, "Great, I can figure out which dozen or so whores I need to kill so no one knows of my newfound cellular cuddle-buddy." As I read on, however, I found that I need not kill female whores, or at least not for any particular reason anyway.

New York Health Commissioner Thomas Freidan stated, "The populations that bear the greatest burden nationally -- blacks, for example, and men who have sex with men -- are highly represented in New York City." WHEW!! Thank god that is not me! Fackin' Queeaahhs!

Once I thought about it, though, I realized that its not the 1980's, and that there is no reason why people should still be getting HIV, especially not in numbers triple that of the rest of the United States. NEW YORKERS ARE MORE LIKELY TO HAVE HIV THAN THEIR SAN FRANCISCAN COUNTERPARTS!!!! Are you serious New York? What the fuck???

Put a damn trash-bag on your dick and die in traditional New York style... at the hands of Pat Bateman.


Pull your head out of your ass New York!

Shawne Merriman

Dude. Your knee is all kinds of fucked up. Have surgery. You're an NFL outside linebacker who rushes the passer and your knee is all kinds of fucked up. Have surgery. You have torn posterior cruciate and lateral collateral ligaments in your left knee that you already had surgery on once. Have surgery. You have seen 4, yes, 4 doctors who have told you to...have surgery. Have the fucking surgery dude.



Pull your head out of your ass Merriman.

Soulja Boy Tell 'Em

I didn't know that was your real name until I decided to shit on you in a public forum (accuracy is paramount here at PYHOOYA). That said, for the rest of this post your new name is "Shit Box"...because that's what you are. You recently stated that you would eschew changing your style from producing crap that was just as likely to come out of the ass of a newborn as it was to come out of the mouth of some talentless asshole from Hotlanta (I'm pretending that you weren't born in Chicago because I won't have you as a blemish on that wonderful town).

You said this...
"If I wanted to, [I could] go that route and be respected [not for] my success ... respected [for] my music and my lyrics or whatever...I'm gonna stick to what I do and stay being successful and I'll do some mixtapes and some futures, something like that."

To that I have a few comments. 1) No. You couldn't be respected for your music or your lyrics because you are neither musically nor lyrically talented. Your name is Shit Box for fuck's sake. 2) I commend you for completely compromising your "ethics" in order to say "successful" (I realize that you're arguably a commercial "success" but you and your music still suck monkey balls so your "success" gets quotes around it). 3) You aren't respected for your "success", you're reviled for it. You are everything that is wrong with the music industry these days. In the words of Jon Stewart you are "hurting america". 4) Stay out of the mixtapes, nobody wants to hear you any more than they already have to.



Pull your head out of your ass Shit Box.

Top 5: Olympic Sports (Comedic Value)

I would love for some feedback on what your top 5 list would look like.

5. Curling

4. Trampoline

3. Synchronized Swimming

2. Race Walking

1. Rhythmic Gymnastics



Pull your head out of your ass legitimate sports

Rhythmic Gymnastics (Part 2)

I'm really just exasperated at the absurdity that is rhythmic gymnastics. How does one even get into that "sport"? I mean if some asshole can get a gold fucking medal for twirling a goddamned ribbon and throwing a dodgeball around to nobody in particular then surely competitive laziness is equally deserving. I can sit around and do nothing with the best of 'em. Shit, I even have variations on moves. I can do the classic sit and do nothing, but then right when you think thats all I've got...BOOM, I'm doing nothing with my hand down my pants. London better watch its ass in 2012 because I'm gonna storm those games and set all kinds of world records.



Seriously...pull your head out of your ass Rhythmic Gymnastics.

Rhythmic Gymnastics

This is an Olympic event? Really? What the fuck...its basically ballerinas doing ludicrous shit with props. They get Olympic medals for that. What kind of props do they use? Oh, I'm glad you asked. They include "rope" (jump rope), "hoop" (hula variety), "ball" (rubber), "ribbon" (attached to baton), and "clubs" (juggling type). That's right, fucking juggling clubs are used in an Olympic event. They should change the name of this event from rhythmic gymnastics to 1st grade gym class because that's basically all it is. The only thing it's missing is the giant parachute for all the "athletes" to get under.



Pull your head out of your ass Rhythmic Gymnastics.

Another Reason the South Sucks

CNN Article

In The article they talk about a form of punishment still used in the U.S., i should say the South used to deter kids from acting out in class. Yes, i am talking about spanking (not by old nuns in catholic school) we are talking about public school. Corporal Punishment is the deliberate infliction of pain intended to punish a person or change his/her behavior. I wonder if they teach this in education courses at universities to the people who are supposed to be molding our children into bright upstanding citizens. A side note: China has banned the practice. China. A country with a much better human rights record.

Not that it needs more reasons but seriously just the fact they call it corporal punishment reiterates how far back the south is compared to the north. Why cant they call it something a little less evil sounding. How about behavior modification (scratch that, it sounds 1984ish). How about Personal Improvement Method Practice (pimp).


(kid getting pimp'ed)

Pull your head out of your ass "The South" and teachers who beat kids.

Olympic Haters

Every time the Summer Games come around people say things like, "The Olympics are boring" or "I like the Winter Games better" or "Who cares about gymnastics or swimming?" Fuck that, don't believe the hate.

Only during the Olympics is it not only completely acceptable, but encouraged, to make thinly veiled offensive comments about another country and cover it up with the guise of nationalism. "The French really surrendered in that 4x100 relay, did they see some Germans?" "That Chinese guy can't win a sprint, he's way too short." "Of course the Kenyans are good at marathons, they run from cheetahs all day."

The US Gymnastics team is all kinds of jailbait hot. American swimmers straight ran a train on the competition. Top all of that off with the cockiest athlete since Neon Deion in his prime, Usain Bolt, and you have two weeks of festivities that make me so excited I could run through a goddamn brick wall.

How can you hate on that?



Pull your head out of your ass Olympic haters.

China

Respect to you China. You managed to make it 11 Olympic days without being thrown under the bus (although, truth be told, I should have gotten around to this days ago...so don't start congratulating yourself just yet). You were doing so well-ish, but then you had to go fuck with women's gymnastics. Are you really that desperate to out medal the US that you would cheat in the Olympics? Weak dude. I mean its not just that you're cheating in the Olympics, but then you had to go further and just give everyone the old "fuck you" by doing such a shitty job of it. You really expect us to believe this girl is 16 years old? In what world? I guess she could maybe pass for 16 in dog years, but certainly not in human years. Nothing in that picture is 16 years old. Okay, maybe the leotard...I don't know your policy on hand me downs. I know you're new to the whole interacting with the rest of the world fairly thing and all so in the future, instead of trying to pass clearly underage girls off as legal just start juicing. It seems to have worked really well for the East Germans in the 80's. Until then...



Pull your head out of your ass China.

Donald Trump

I know what you're all thinking (even you Trump, witcha bitch ass): here's another asshole making fun of trump for his ridiculous hair, or his ridiculous catchphrase, or his ridiculous show, or any number of the other ridiculous things about him that make him such a choad. You'd be wrong. We here at PYHOOYA do not condone repetitious jokes even when they're at someone else's expense. Today, Donald Trump, you're being shit on for what you're doing to the Chicago skyline. (Here it is in all its awesomeness). We don't hate you for building another tall ass building, those are pretty common, but just look at the glare you're putting off...and the goddamned thing isn't even finished yet. There's a fucking crane on the top of that building right now, not that you could tell from looking at it. Is blinding all Chicagoans part of some Trumpian master plan of yours? Did Omarosa suggest this?



Pull your head out of your ass Trump.

Airlines

Delays...that's all I got.



Pull your head out of your ass Airlines.

The Hoff

Seriously, get that dog off your penis.



Pull your head out of your ass Hoff.

Nancy Grace

I'm not even sure I can get started on this one. She's horrible. She's the devil. She's everything that is wrong with the world. And now she's getting sued for wrongful death for causing the mother of a missing toddler to kill herself. That's right, she has the unholy ability to pester someone into suicide. On behalf of myself, the Duke Lacrosse team and the countless souls you've destroyed: go away.



Pull your head out of your ass Nancy Grace.

Text Book Publishers

Why are you assholes? You prey on poor students in college or grad school (I'm not counting high school because there you're preying on the parents of those poor students) by making them pay insanely high prices for books. Its not enough that we pay thousands of dollars to further ourselves through knowledge is it? No. Fuck students apparently. Its totally reasonable to release new editions of math books every year because we all know how quickly math evolves...Seriously eat a dick. I couldn't find a picture of publishers stealing from poor people so I'm just putting up a picture of another asshole.



Pull your head out of your ass Text Book Publishers.

Indiana

Apparently Indiana isn't happy with their current slogan: "Indiana, how the fuck else are you supposed to get to Michigan?" They seem to have decided they need to separate themselves from the other shitty states in the union by doing obnoxious things like not observe daylight savings time. Now they're going for a slogan of "Seriously, we really suck." I don't know whether I'm more annoyed by the absurdity of it all or by the arrogance of this completely irrelevant state. Even maps of time zones are confused (see below). Finally, I realize that Arizona has a similar non-adherence to daylight savings time, but frankly...Arizona just doesn't suck ass the way Indiana does, so it gets a pass.




Pull your head out of your ass Indiana.

Male Tramp Stamp Guy

I went to Lollapalooza last night. The Glow in the Dark show was incredible, and I defy you to find a greater song than this. Anyway, the real highlight of the day was when I saw this.



That's right, a mother fucking male tramp stamp. Mother. Fucking. Male. Tramp. Stamp. And, it's a snowflake. I can only assume that he has a sun around his navel, because he's "just down with nature." And being a douche.

Pull your head out of your ass Male Tramp Stamp Guy.

Da Green Bay (butt)Packers

Lets recap the past week with the organization regarding Brett Favre:
1)They had told him no
2)Considered trading him (even to DA BEARS)
3)And decided to give him $20 million to not play

So what was the outcome?

After all that craziness the (butt)Packers have decided the reinstate the legendary douche bag

You ask why?

Because --->Brett Favre is the Hannah Montana of Football












Pull your head out of your ass Packer fans.

History? Nah...let's just make up some wild shit.

So the last time I checked the dinosaurs died because of a big ass meteorite hitting Earth and causing a massive dust cloud to block out the sun... but the HISTORY Channel decided that they wanted to keep it real. The dinosaurs didn't die from that weak sauce meteorite shit. They died because they all fought each other in crazy cage matches... hence their new series:



JURASSIC mother-fucking FIGHT CLUB...

Pull your head out of your ass History Channel.

Moving

Ok its the first of the month and that means its moving time for some of us. Its about the worst thing ever. Interestingly the two busiest months of the year for this horrible experience are two of the hottest...July and August. Its like some guy thought to himself "hey self, can you think of a way to make an already horrible experience worse," and then he said "oh hell yeah I can, just make people do it when its 90 degrees out and humid." Some people might argue that its better to move when its "nice" out than in say...may perhaps. Those people would be wrong.



Pull your head out of your ass Moving.

Dumb People

So according to this poll 13% of America thinks the country is "generally headed in the right direction." I don't even know what to do with that or where to start...credit crisis/housing bubble perhaps? That's a good start. How about Vietnam 2.0? Yeah that's awesome. I could go on but I might vomit with rage so I'm gonna stop.



Pull your head out of your ass Dumb People.

Cranberry Sauce

Look at it. Easily the most delicious of all Thanksgiving foods. I love it from a can; it's like Cranberry Jello. I could eat my body weight in Cranberry Sauce.

So why the hell don't we all eat it outside of the fourth Thursday of November? Because we are failures. All of us. Cranberry Sauce needs to get it's act together and make itself a staple in my daily diet.

Pull your head out of your ass Cranberry Sauce, I want to eat you more.

Ted Stevens

You were indicted today on seven counts of...you know what it doesn't fucking matter. You're a corrupt bastard. I mean yeah you're old as shit so I'll overlook your internet as a series of tubes comment, but the bridge to nowhere? Really? Weak dude. How did you think that was gonna go? Hey Uncle Sam can I have $320 million to build a bridge to connect 8,900 people? Oh sure Ted, would you like a hand job too? Seriously dude, you suck. Enjoy federal pound you in the ass prison the butt farm.

Pull your head out of your ass Stevens.

IT'S NOT A TUMOR!!

Tuesday, McCain eased worries about his dermatological health by announcing that some fucked up lesion on his skin was not a tumor. Does he feel good about that? Sure. Does he feel like he runs a higher risk of getting skin cancer because his dad was in the Navy? Sure... McCain commented: "As you know my dad was in the Navy and we lived in places where I was at the beach a lot, and I'm paying the price for that."

Well douchebag, we all have to pay a price for the freedoms that we enjoy, and the price for you is skin cancer. Pull your head out of your ass McCain.

John McCain

We here at PYHOOYA are all young, fairly intelligent gentlemen with some semblance of a social conscience. As such, we believe in the power of Obama (all except the Fail Bus Driver, who favors the status quo, hates poor people, and believes in the almighty power of Walmart to run our nation).

Coming from this blatantly biased viewpoint, it is time to get political up in this beast and call out Big Daddy John McCain.

McCain recently referenced the border between Iraq and Pakistan. Here is that border.



You're running on a foreign policy platform you geriatric clown. Have that daughter of yours get you a globe for your centennial.

Pull your head out of your ass McCain.

NL West

The current standings for the NL West are as follows.



Is this a joke? One team above .500 (barely)? Bill Simmons used to call the National League Quadruple A baseball. I'm calling the NL West the straight Bush League. That is awful. I'm legitimately embarrassed for these failures. And don't even get me started on the Padres. A team of drunk midgets could go 42-65.

Pull your head out of your ass NL West.

Levar Burton

That's what's hot on the streets? Reading books?



Pull your head out of your ass Burton.

Huta

We're gonna go off-topic for a while (the general topic being douchebags we don't know), and talk about a douchebag we know. We here at PYHOOYA share any and all revenue that comes in equally. Our 3rd Quarter projection for 2008 is $0. However, Huta is not pulling his weight. Put a fucking post up.



Pull your head out of your ass Huta.

Update: Huta is currently attempting to be quite sketchy. It will not work out for him.

To reiterate, pull your head out of your ass Huta.

Prada

This is a model? No. This is DJ Qualls.



Pull your head out of your ass Prada.

Tennis Ball Haircut Guy

You a tennis fan? No? Just a fan of looking like a dickface? OK, got it. Don't have kids.



Pull your head out of your ass guy.

China Olympics (preemptive strike)

Hey China, sweet air, it looks like there's some broke ass blizzard going on there except that guy is in short sleeves. Why do you think that is? Do you think it's because its June July? Yeah I bet that's why. But yeah your Olympics is gonna be off the hook. Nobody's gonna get sick from your toxic air at all. Totally. We here at PYHOOYA are very much looking forward to it.



Pull your head out of your ass China.

Comcast

2500? Word?



Pull your head out of your ass Comcast.

Devin Hester

Devin Hester on why he deserved a new contract from the Chicago Bears...

"You should pay me like I'm one of a kind. It's like dating a girl. When you find somebody who is real special, you're going to do whatever it takes to keep her. You might cut back on what you're giving your mom to give to her. And that's how I feel they should treat me."

Booooooo



Pull your head out of your ass Hester.

Law Enforcement

Cops banging hookers.

Vice Officers can have sex as part of their job. I swear to god.



Pull your head out of your ass law enforcement.